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Oct 24, 2022

One thing that I’ve really embraced throughout my own burnout journey and helping other physicians through burnout is that guilt is a 4-letter-word (I know it’s actually 5, but work with me here).

As women and as physicians, the amount of guilt we feel can feel pretty suffocating and there are some changes that we can make in our own lifestyle and mindset to help change how we look at situations that bring us feelings of guilt.

I spoke with Dr. Jennifer Reid this week about guilt and how we can adjust our mindset to shift how we interpret guilt. The key to navigating situations that bring us feelings of guilt is to understand what expectations we have set for ourselves or the expectations that have been impressed upon us by society. 

By nailing down where we are getting our expectations, we can dissect that ideology and decide if those expectations are realistic or if we are giving ourselves credit for the things we are accomplishing or that we are doing well. 

Another component that comes with navigating guilt is to approach it with self-compassion. Set the bar for yourself like you would set the bar for a loved one - with grace, flexibility, and understanding. 

Tune in to our discussion to see where you can find the grey area in your life to flip the script on guilt and give yourself the understanding you deserve as a busy mother, physician, spouse, and friend. 

“Guilt equals expectations minus reality.” Dr. Jennifer Reid

In this episode:

[01:28] Welcome to the show Dr. Reid!

[01:37] Dr. Reid’s background and what she’s up to.

[02:17] Recognizing the symptoms of burnout or depression 

[04:13] Clarifying the feelings behind guilt.

[06:36] Managing unrealistic expectations of yourself.

[07:58] Setting expectations with self-compassion in mind.

[09:35] Embracing the grey area of expectations and allowing room for grace. 

[11:23] How to manage you expectations to be the perfect parent or partner.

[14:47] Balancing parenthood with being a physician and understanding that you can’t do the perfect mom gig while doing the perfect physician gig. 

[17:18] How to use “if-then” statements to relinquish control over things that don’t serve you

[18:28] Go into situations knowing that you’re going to do it imperfectly. It’s ok to be “good enough.” 

[19:17] Nobody is perfect and there is relief in sharing your flaws. 

[20:12] One failure does not negate all of your successes.

[21:55] The awesome things that Dr. Reid is bringing to the world to help widen the perspective on guilt. 

Links and Resources

Witch, Please Podcast

Episode 308: Fierce Self-Compassion with Dr. Kristen Neff

Connect with Dr. Reid

The Reflective Doc

The Reflective Doc Podcast

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